Tuesday, August 3, 2010

Hanging in There

Well, it has been one hell of a week. I don't think I have ever experienced so many emotions in such a short time, and I feel like I have been in Miyazaki City for months, not just seven days.

I am adjusting as best as I can. I have definitely had my ups and downs. It seems that when I am with other JETs or talking to friendly teachers and students at school, I feel great and the time flies. However, it is the moments when I am alone in my apartment, or feeling lost, or overwhelmed and culture shocked and homesick that really get to me. This was especially true when my predecessor, Paul, left for Tokyo. I didn't realize how much I depended on having another foreigner to talk to and to get help from. Yesterday at school, I went into full-on panic mode and started sobbing uncontrollably. I have never, ever felt more scared or lost in my life. I am praying that I will never feel that way again-while I realize that I will not become completely adjusted overnight, I hope the worst of it is over. Another thing that is getting me down is the lack of internet in my apartment--I won't get it for two weeks--and although there is internet at school, I cannot use Skype. I also do not have a phone yet, but I am hopefully, hopefully getting my IPhone with internet today. I signed up for the contract yesterday but there was some problem with the computer system they had to fix first. So, I feel very cut off from home. I think that once that barrier is broken, things will improve immensely. Finally, I do not have air conditioning, a fridge, or a washing machine in my apartment yet. Since there is no AC and it is HOT AS HELL and humid here, I have had no motivation to unpack everything. So, my apartment doesn't really feel like home yet. But I know it soon will...I just have to be patient.

However, don't think that I am completely miserable! I have had some really fun and exciting days here too. My supervisor has been immensely helpful to me. Yesterday, while I was having my sob fest, she took me to a separate room where I could be alone, and when she came in later to see how I was doing, she was crying too--she said it was because she did not like to see me so sad. That day, she took me to an art museum nearby where student art from all over Japan was displayed. There is a national high school festival taking place right now, and each year a different prefecture hosts it--and this happens to be the year for Miyazaki prefecture! You would not BELIEVE how talented these kids are. I wanted to buy half of the paintings and sculptures and put them in my apartment, lol. The other teachers in the office have been very friendly too--they come by and talk to me, and I know it takes a lot for them to do that since their English isn't like mine. The vice principal, who is one of the nicest guys here, even came by and told me if I ever needed anything, I could ask him. I think word got around that I wasn't feeling my best, and it is great to have so much support. On Monday, I took a walk around the school and met some of the students. This REALLY lifted my spirits and reminded me why I was here. The students are SO friendly and happy, and this school has a wonderful atmosphere. A group of female students who I had never met ran after me outside, calling my name, and talked to me for a good 15 minutes. They, too, seemed to have heard through the grapevine about how I was feeling. AND, a teacher who I chatted with this morning said that kids in her class were asking about me and concerned about me. :) I cannot wait to start teaching. Right now, the kids and teachers are on summer vacation, so I am kind of hanging out at the school for a week and a half. (Hence why I have time to write this blog at school). I am sure the boredom does not help matters; I want to be busy! I hope to help with the school band and set up a pen pal exchange with American students. I will also be helping with debate, speech team, and an English camp, in addition to planning lessons. I know the time will fly.

I have also been hanging out with other JETs. I have met the other people in my complex, and everyone seems so nice and willing to help me. Two girls in the apartments are also new, and we have been kind of turning to each other for comfort and venting about the strange bathrooms and lack of air conditioning. Another girl who has been here for two years and is starting her third year took me to an Indian restaurant with two of her friends the same day she met me. Paul took me to a BEAUTIFUL shrine right next to my high school and showed me how to wash my hands with water and dippers and then pray at the shrine. Hopefully I will be going to the beach soon as well with Paul and his girlfriend. On August 16th the Miyazaki orientation starts, and then all of the JETs in the prefecture will finally be here (we come in three groups) so I can meet more people.

And of course, in addition to talking to other JETs and getting support at school, just chilling out and watching movies like "Adventures in Babysitting" and "Anchorman: The Legend of Ron Burgundy" always helps. :D

Oh! Yesterday I had a genuine adventure. :D I decided to ride my bike home from school. Paul left me a very good and detailed map, so I figured I would be fine. I got about halfway home, no problems, and I was feeling good. Then, I was riding along, and all of a sudden, things just did not feel right. I was heading into what seemed like a forest, with a large expressway on my right. I turned around and just figured I'd retrace my path. I somehow wound up in a rural village complete with rice paddies and traditional Japanese homes. I saw an older Japanese woman with two adorable children and said "Sumimasen!" which means "excuse me". I then attempted in broken Japanese to ask the way to my apartment. She looked utterly confused, and my heart began to sank. However, there was a Japanese man across the street who owned a motorbike repair shop, and he was kind of listening to our conversation. He walked over to us and asked to see my map. I tried to explain to HIM what was going on, and eventually he said, "Issho ni ikimasen" which I know means, "Let's go together." So this man I had never met before stopped working in his shop, lifted my bike for me and put it in the back of his van, and then drove me home. Now, before any of you freak out about me getting into a van with a stranger (wow that does sound sketchy) this is a testament to the safety of Japan and the kindness of the Japanese people. I knew that I could trust this guy the moment he started helping me. It was definitely one of the best moments of the week.

One more thing....in the front hallway of the school, there is a poster that says, "Welcome Sandy!" that all of the kids signed. I look at the poster whenever I have doubts and remember why I am here.

It won't be long before I can start communicating with everyone properly...I can't wait! I know I promised pictures, but I cannot put those up until I have the internet set up in my place. But they will be there soon--I assure you! And I am working on getting postcards too...they will come eventually, I promise.

I love and miss you all. :)

Sandy

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